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Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder

 

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

 

This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

 

As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table thatI brought up from the mail box earlier.

 

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

 

I lay my car keys on the table,put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

 

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

 

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

 

I take my check book off the table and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk whereI find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking..

 

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi asideso that I don't accidentally knock it over.

 

The Pepsi is getting warm,and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

 

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,a vase of flowers on the countercatches my eye--they need water.

 

I put the Pepsi on the counter anddiscover my reading glasses thatI've been searching for all morning.

 

I decide I better put them back on my desk,but first I'm going to water the flowers.

 

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.

 

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,I'll be looking for the remote,but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,but first I'll water the flowers.

 

I pour some water in the flowers,but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table,get some towels and wipe up the spill.

 

Then, I head down the hall trying toremember what I was planning to do.

      At the end of the day:

      the car isn't washed

      The water is still running

      the bills aren't paid

      there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter

      the flowers don't have enough water

      there is still only 1 check in my check book

      I can't find the remote

      I can't find my glasses, and

      I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,

I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day,and I'm really tired.

 

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail....

 

Do me a favor. Forward this message to everyone you know,because I don't remember who I've sent it to.Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!